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So at any rate, I got the restraining order
vacated about a month ago and yesterday,
I went into Court and faced the music
regarding my alleged violations while the order was in effect.
State of Massachusetts 0
It was a massacre.
When the score reached 27 to 0, they offered to forfeit the game
and declare it to be a dismissal.
I met up with Paula and Jerry yesterday
and we also agreed to drop our scheduled suits.
Now if anyone has an idea of how I can get my son Thomas
is gone with respect to contact,
Fortunately, Owen has been smart enough to figure this all out.
I love him.
Who knew he was the smartest kid in the whole family?
It's just love.
I love my kids. I adore my kids.
I even love my ex wife Paula and ,
get this, I .... love Jerry.
I mean, I know that he's a good guy
and (dear) brother TIm. They both gave me incredible support. And (dear) Karen, well, Happy Birthday. I love you.
Andy, I have to say was very helpful.
And among my friends,
and John Almeida
went out of their way to help me.
Rick came out in the middle of the night to rescue me
and Gary saved me when I ran out of gas 200 yards from a Mobil station.
John came to my Court appearance-- the only one who came.
And other of my friends,
like Stacie Charbonneau gave me inspiration to trust in the Lord
and my friend Jay McInney
who told me that the answer was to just "Let Go",
which took me a while to figure out.
And then there are so many more people
-- literally hundreds, who shared whatever they had with me--
their knowledge, their thoughts, their love.
I'd like to give special mention to Cassandra, my Shiloh,
who has given me her heart, and has stood by me
through thick and thin.
And Michelle, Erika, Alexis, Kim, Melissa, Poppy,
Devon, Brandy, Ariana, Sunshine, Desiree
and some others too.
Like Pastor John Kjoller, and Gretchen, and Darcey,
And Dan Beard... whose special knowledge of the trees
and the wind and the air... filled me
And to those passed by, those lying in eternal rest,
and those yet unborn...
And to those of you who I didn't mention.
I didn't forget you. My battery is about to die.
You can't beat love, although if you hum a few bars,
I can play along.
John Edwin Bescherer
October 13, 2006
|From:||"John Bescherer" <>|
|Subject:||Fwd: RE: Mass complaint for protection from abuse by Paula Chambers|
|CC:||"Edwin A Bescherer" <>, "Karen Metheny" <>, "Rick Goodell" <>|
I am trying to make sense of this whole thing. If
anyone can help figure this out, I would surely
I know that this is an immensely difficult situation
but I have not been able to get Dad/my father to
listen to me. He just keep talking in vague
generalities and repeating things other people have
If you could find it in your heart to help me out and
talk with Dad to see if there is anything in
particular I have done, I would surely appreciate
I will send a copy of the restraining order under a
--- John Bescherer <> wrote:
> Date: Wed, 19 Jul 2006 04:31:25 -0700 (PDT)
> From: John Bescherer <>
> Subject: RE: Mass complaint for protection from
> abuse by Paula Chambers
> To: Jerry McIntyre <>
> CC: Ginny Greenwood <>
> I have been trying to make sense of the 209A order
> (sent to you last night by email) and do not
> understand the allegations that I have caused anyone
> to be in fear of imminent serious physical harm.
> Since I was in Connecticut yesterday morning with my
> parents and did not talk with or see Paula until she
> arrived back at her house at about 9:30PM with my
> kids, I don't know what I could have done "on or
> 7.18.06" to cause her to be in "fear of imminent
> serious physical harm" as she alleges.
> I saw several people during the day after leaving
> Connecticut at about 6:30AM and before arriving in
> Sandwich at 8:30PM. I also have receipts from
> coffee shops etc. which I believe will document the
> fact that I was out of state and certainly no where
> near Sandwich until 8:30PM last night. At that time,
> went over to the restaurant where my daughter Kelly
> works and I talked with her boss and with Kelly.
> was no incident or argument.
> After I saw Kelly, I went over to the Chamber's
> No one was there when I knocked on the door,
> the TV was going, the lights were all on, etc.
> me to think that someone might be home. No one
> answered the bell.
> I turned to leave and notice the Chamber's phone
> sitting on the stairs. I looked at the list of
> calls and saw calls from my father, my girlfriend's
> mother and from Paula's mother and father.
> I had a nice conversation with Paula's mother while
> was waiting for Paula and the kids to come home. We
> discussed what has been happening and why my ex-wife
> would take this course of action.
> I also had a brief conversation with my girlfriend's
> mother, Dorothy Burrill of Mattapoisett, while I was
> waiting. I can't imagine why she would have been in
> contact with Paula. However, my girlfriend (Nancy
> Benson of Mattapoisett) and I had a falling out on
> Saturday and her mother has been calling a lot of
> people alleging that I have done her daughter wrong.
> (I think she's nuts.)
> Before I came down to Sandwich, I tried to talk with
> my girlfriend over at her house and her mother came
> out of the house and would not let me talk with her.
> She kept screaming "Don't talk with him Nancy.
> not allowed to talk with him Nancy." to my
> I asked politely to have a few minutes to talk with
> girlfriend but her mother wouldn't stop screaming.
> Therefore, I left.
> I have no idea of what Ms. Burrill has been saying
> I have many witnesses available, including my
> girlfriend's father and her last boyfriend, who
> testify that her mother has no grasp of reality. If
> have to go to court, I would like to have her
> subpoenaed to find out what she has been saying.
> address is )
> My girlfriend and I had an argument in the car on
> Friday while we were driving up to Vermont. Since we
> started late, I was tired and my girlfriend offered
> drive as we approached Boston. I started to look for
> my glasses in the back seat once she started driving
> (my contacts were bothering me) and this upset my
> girlfriend. I also made a phone call to one of my
> customers. This further upset my girlfrience who
> that I should be going to sleep. When I explained
> I had to do and why, she decided that she didn't
> to go and turned the car around and headed south on
> Route 128. I asked her to pull the car over to talk
> but she refused. I asked her to let me out of the
> and she repeatedly refused. Things calmed down after
> while and we returned to Mattapoisett Friday night
> had a nice dinner and night together. When we
> on Saturday morning to give the trip another try
> (perhaps we had both been tired from a long week),
> set off again at about 9:00AM on Saturday. My
> girlfriend strongly objected to my bringing bacon
> my car (it was wrapped in multiple layers of paper
> towel) and also demanded that I not try to figure
> how to work a new Satellite radio I had bought on
> Friday (and had just installed on Saturday morning).
> decided that we needed some time off and turned the
> car around and headed home immediately, having gone
> further than a half mile from my house.
> My girlfriend decided at that point to end the
> relationship and immediately began to pull all of
> possessions out of my house. I asked her to take
> she needed immediately and to come back later for
> rest but she refused. Since she wouldn't leave, I
> and went to a coffee house near my home. After
> there for about an hour, I decided that my having to
> be out of my house was not fair, so I called the
> police to come over and politely ask my girlfriend
> leave. Since she already had all her possessions in
> yard when we arrived (the police officer and I), the
> officer suggested that she continue to take her
> stay out of my house from that time on and that we
> both stay calm. I went into my house, took a shower,
> wrote some emails and then left again after about an
> I tried to call my girlfriend that night but was
> by my girlfriend's mother that the relationship was
> over and that I should just break off contact. The
> more I thought about it, the more I realized that my
> girlfriend needed treatment and mental health
> counseling. I tried to contact her and said that all
> wanted was an apology and for her to agree to get
> help. She refused.
> The more I thought about it, the more I began to be
> bothered by her actions on Friday night in the car.
> thought that if the situations had been reversed
> my driving) and I had refused to let her out of the
> car at her request, I would have been subject to
> arrest for holding someone against their will
> (whatever the right legal term is). I became more an
> more concerned by her actions and finally suggested
> that if she would not agree to get help, or make an
> apology, I would pursue a claim against her for
> held me against my will.
> This thought evidently started the barn fire which
> now raging. Rather than apologizing or agreeing to
> into counseling, my girlfriend (or her mother, I
> know who's doing what) decided to make their own
> allegations against me. There haven't been any
> specific allegations but her mother called my father
> and caused him great concern. My girlfriend also
> down to the police station on Sunday to request them
> to come after me (for what I don't know.) I talked
> with the town police chief on Sunday and was told
> there was nothing that the police were going to be
> able to do and that we should both calm down and
> away from each other for a while. That is where I
> thought that we ahd left it, but her mother has
> evidently been pursuing the matter on her own and
> been calling my ex-wife and my father and has
> reportedly commenced the process of getting a
> no-trespass order set up against me. (I haven't
> received it.)
> So at any rate, after seeing my parents in
> Connecticut, I headed back towards this area
> morning and worked all day as I was driving. (I am
> in sales and I made a lot of phone calls and several
> visits along the way.)
> My only contact with Paula yesterday was an email
> (copies below) and some phone messages I left. I
> looked again at my email and I don't think that
> calling someone "Monkeybuttface" can reasonably be
> interpreted as a threat of violence. I don't think
> that "shitforbrains" qualifies either.
> The only thing I remember saying on my phone message
> was that if Paula didn't put the kids on the phone
> with me, I would send the police to her house again.
> (I have been unable to get my kids or Paula on the
> phone for about a week.)
> This was one of the most embarassing experiences of
> life. It was also unfortunate that the kids had to
> witness to this. However, I guess that the mature
> we handled it in front of the police will help them
> little bit. When this is all over, I intend to give
> the various parties which abetted Ms. Chambers
> complaints a piece of my mind.
> I didn't like the fact that Jerry Chambers imposed
> himself physically between my children and me when
> and Paula drove up with my boys last night. I had no
> idea there was a restraining order in issuance and
> did not inform me of this fact or give me a copy of
> the order.
> Instead, he just took a football linebacker pose and
> said that I couldn't see or talk with my kids. He
> said that if I tried to go over to see my boys, he
> would call the police. I do believe that he would
> have attacked me to stop me from seeing the boys.
> pose was very threatening.) I believe that I have a
> nire valid basis for an allegation of being in fear
> imminent serious physical harm than my ex-wife does.
> However, as I said, since I had no knowledge of any
> restraining order, I just thought that he had lost
> mind and when he said he was going to call the
> I called them myself and asked them to come over.
> While they were on their way, I found out about the
> restraining order.
> I am wondering if there has to be a basis in fact
> one of these 209A claims. I assume that there is
> a requirement but I also wonder what the court does
> when it finds out there was no basis for a claim
> Do they ever find the plaintiff guilty of perjury?
> Various people believe that my abrasive personality
> evidence of some mental illness on my part. I was
> under treatment for depression from last September
> with a therapist until some time in March. I had
> broken my leg in November 2004 and had been confined
> to my couch for about six months (it was my right
> and it was a serious injury). My injury kept me out
> work. As part of my efforts to recover last year, I
> went to see the therapist. As my leg began healing
> I became able to walk again and participate in
> society, I gradually began to feel better.
> I stopped seeing my therapist in March (with his
> concurrence). I thought that we had no serious
> left to talk about.
> I have also been seeing a psychiatrist since
> September. He had prescribed an anti-depressant for
> and he also thought I had adult onset ADD, so he
> prescibed Adderall for me. I discontinued the
> anti-depressant with his consent last month but
> continue to take the ADD medicine.
> I am positive that both my therapist (Dr. Neal Bowen
> of New Bedford) and my psychiatrist (Dr. Mohammad
> Munir of New Bedford) would agree that I have shown
> evidence of any tendency towards violence.
> So at any rate, having to deal with all this is not
> fun. More than anything, I want your advice and
> counsel on what I should do.
> First priority would be to have the 209A complaint
> overturned but I wonder if there isn't some way for
> someone to talk with Ms. Chambers out of court and
> explain things to her.
> Can she just go to the Court and say "Never Mind"?
> think that any prudent person can see that this
> thing is a waste of the Court's time. I don't
> particularly care to make an issue of Paula's
> Wouldn't that make things easier? Can she do that
> without suffering some legal harm?
> Assuming that conciliation efforts don't work, what
> the swiftest way to overturn the claim?
> Thanks for your help.
> John Bescherer
> 508-284-4093 (Cell)
> --- John Bescherer <email@example.com> wrote:
> Date: Tue, 18 Jul 2006 02:51:53 -0700 (PDT)
> From: "John Bescherer" <firstname.lastname@example.org> View
> Contact Details View Contact Details Add Mobile
> Subject: Re: Kelly and work
> To: Send an Instant Message "Paula Nicholson"
> CC: "ed bescherer" <email@example.com>, "Kelly
> Bescherer" <firstname.lastname@example.org>
> Hey MONKEYBUTTFACE,
> you copied your email to my parents, remember? So
> don't complain about "my having involved them."
> The class is a special promotion. It normally costs
> $400 but Range Rover was offering it as a special
> incentive to new car buyers for only $95. She can't
> take it "next month".
> When I called to find out if the class was still
> they said I could come either day. The next day,
> Kelly said she could go Thursday, they said that
> had canceled the Thursday class and were only going
> have it on Wednesday. So I asked if she could get
> day off and she told me she would ask.
> Paula, you haven't let me talk to the kids for three
> days now. According to the last info I had, Kelly
> not asked and did not have the day off. I know that
> she is shy. I thought that asking politely would not
> cause her any grief.
> She hadn't asked.
> Not only that, as her boss told me, she hadn't even
> asked for time off for the next two weeks until
> of this week. Her poor boss was trying to figure out
> what to do when I called him. He said he was stuck.
> likes Kelly but he regrets having fired his other
> worker to take on Kelly.
> I said I was sorry that Kelly had left him in the
> lurch and offered to help him out so that he
> be stuck. Not only that but $9 an hour isn't too bad
> and I could use a little cash right now.
> Lying and not telling the truth are basically the
> thing, shit for brains. You never figured that out,
> did you?
> "Tell the truth and you don't have to remember
> anything." I just made that up. Sounds good, don't
> --- Paula Nicholson <email@example.com> wrote:
> > John--
> > You arent making sense. I didnt tell you any
> > you asked me to talk to Kelly about taking a
> > driving class on wednesday or thursday . You
> > either day was OK. I told you thursday would work
> > for her because she wasnt scheduled to work on
> > thursday. I guess it didnt work for you-- I am
> > gathering, although you never said that to me.
> > There was no lie involved on my part. I think the
> > class is a good idea, but as I said last week she
> > works on weds. Maybe she can take it in
> > August...but calling her work place to say she was
> > being dishonest to her boss is so ridiculous I
> > even know what to say. She is prioritizing her
> > right now, and fitting in classes and fun around
> > work schedule, she wasnt lying to her boss about
> > anything. I respect her work ethic and you should
> > too.
> > What kind of "concerned parent" attempts to get
> > their daughter fired in her first week at a new
> > John I dont know what to say to you. I am not
> > interested in typing away all day on my computer
> > cast of the accusations that you throw at me. I
> > dont like getting your parents involved either ,
> > I am at a loss sometimes as to what to do. Paula
> > John Bescherer <firstname.lastname@example.org> wrote:
> > Paula, calling Kelly's boss is something any
> > concerned
> > parent would do. Evidently, you are not concerned
> > about Kelly's driving or at least not enough to
> > and work out something which might help her reach
> > the
> > skill level she needs in order to drive safely. I
> > sent
> > you the card from the course. I think that it
> > really valuable. It's too bad she can't take it
> > because I think it could really give her practical
> > experience in emergency driving procedures and
> > might have helped to save her life or the life of
> > one
> > of her passengers some day. Oh well, there will be
> > other courses.
> > The fact that Kelly didn't tell her boss and that
> > you
> > didn't encourage her to do so shows that you do
> > value responsibility towards employers. But the
> > problems my call caused were caused by your lying
> > me and I guess Kelly lying to her boss. (I don't
> > know
> > if you were involved.) And yes, I think that not
> > telling the truth is the same thing as lying.
> > If you hadn't lied to me and had actually told me
> > that
> > Kelly hadn't asked her boss for the day off, I
> > wouldn't have thought to call her boss and ask him
> > to
> > make an accommodation. (I couldn't see what the
> > difference to him would have been-- having her
> > a
> > Thursday or a Wednesday.)
> > As it was, I was embarrassed by the predicament
> > Kelly has left him in. He let another worker go
> > because he thought he could count on Kelly. He
> > regrets
> > having trusted her. That obviously means nothing
> > you. I don't really care if he fires her. He
> > fire her for something like this. I thought my
> > to help out was one way of helping her keep the
> > Stop emailing my parents. These things are between
> > you
> > and I. They have enough to worry about with
> > depression last year, Owen's knife-wielding event
> > and,
> > well at least Tom is in the clear. (I think or is
> > there something you haven't told me.)
> > I don't think you are teaching the kids good
> > about responsibility, truthfulness or anything
> > that.
> > I am sorry you will miss the kids this weekend. It
> > is
> > my weekend. You scheduled Owen for activities the
> > whole month of August and Kelly is tied up, etc.
> > Under the agreement we made, I am to get the kids
> > one
> > week a month and all major holidays weekends. Go
> > back
> > and read it. Also, you are supposed to be living
> > Mattapoisett. You agreed to these things Paula.
> > agreed that in the event you didn't keep the
> > agreement
> > that we could move the kids back to Rhode Island.
> > don't want to do that (obviously) at this point
> > I
> > do think that a court will force you to bring the
> > kids
> > back to Mattapoisett.
> > Start packing.
> > XOXO
> > P
> > --- Paula Nicholson
> > wrote:
> > >
> > > John--
> > > I heard your messages this morning. I will not
> > > calling you back- I will be responding via email
> > for
> > > the time being, and I am copying your dad on
> > > everything because I think he should know what
> > > are doing to your children.
> > > Kelly is at work and cant call you back right
> > > I am becoming increasingly angry with you by the
> > > day! It was SOO wrong of you to call kellys boss
> > > and undermine her! She is likely to lose her job
> > as
> > > a result of your interference. I told you last
> > week
> > > that she doesnt work on thursday ansd that she
> > could
> > > take the class with you. She didnt need to ask
> > > a day off, she already HAD the day off- Why make
> > her
> > > sound irresponsible to her boss??!! Why are you
> > > offering to work her shifts?? Get your own job.
> > > After what you just did I doubt now that she
> > > want to go with you; and that is a shame because
> > > think a driving class was a good idea.
> > > As far as next week when she is at MIT--that
> > > your business to get her in trouble with her
> > > for that, she was speaking with her coworkers
> > about
> > > covering two of her shifts and then she was
> > to
> > > come back and working friday, sat. and sunday.
> > > is her life and her business.
> > > -Do you really want everybody you know to
> > > you? Dont do things like that to Kelly !!!
> > > Paula
> > >
> > >
> > > ---------------------------------
> > > Want to be your own boss? Learn how on Yahoo!
> > Small
> > > Business.
> > ---------------------------------
> > Want to be your own boss? Learn how on Yahoo!
> > Business.
> Delete Reply Forward Move...
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> > Date: Mon, 17 Jul 2006 05:23:37 -0700 (PDT)
> > From: John Bescherer <email@example.com>
> > Subject: Re: camping trip
> > To: Paula Nicholson <firstname.lastname@example.org>
> > Paula, whether or not I chain smoke is none of
> > business. Yes I am irritable sometimes too. That
> > none of your business either.
> > I am not having any mental health issues. That at
> > least is what my doctors thing, even though you
> > diagnosed me with the Jerry Chambers eyeglass
> > I am sleeping just fine. I don't know how you
> > measure
> > this but I got 6 hours last night and 7 hours the
> > night before. Perhaps I could sleep more if you
> > your new friend with benefits would stop
> > with my rights as a joint parent with you of the
> > children.
> > So all your comments are unwelcomed and are none
> > your business.
> > I'll see the kids tomorrow night and I would
> > your plans now for the weekend. If you want to go
> > back
> > to court over this, I will.
> > I'm through putting up with your bullshit.
> > --- Paula Nicholson <email@example.com> wrote:
> > > John--
> > > There are two issues here involved in making a
> > > decision on whether or not I should cancel my
> > family
> > > camping trip at your request.
> > > The first and most important one is that the
> > last
> > > several times that the kids have been at your
> > house
> > > they say you are acting extremely irritable ,
> > > arent sleeping , you are chain smoking and your
> > > behavior is self centered and irrational. None
> > > the three kids want to be with you right now,
> > > frankly I am not comfortable with them being
> > > you right now. I think you are having a mental
> > > health issue that you need to address- (you
> > > get mad at me for diagnosing you so I wont put a
> > > name to your behavior, but you need to get
> > > about getting help for it). Until you do -they
> > wont
> > > be going over there.
> > > This mental health issue makes the second
> > > of whether or not I properly informed you
> > I
> > > feel that I did; through several phone calls,
> > > online bescherer/chambers family calendar and
> > email)
> > > - a moot point.
> > > I want you to be healthy and have a good
> > > relationship with the kids. I REALLY do, I am
> > > trying to keep them from you. But they cant
> > > over until you take care of yourself.
> > > If you do then the kids can certainly spend
> > > time with you in August. I hope though, that
> > > will try to avoid missing too many football
> > I
> > > dont care if you didnt chip in for football or
> > > camp--they are not "my" activities or
> > > "your"activities--they are Owens. Owen really
> > needs
> > > this activity both physically and socially. You
> > can
> > > bring him to his games/practices and hopefully
> > > in fun time around his schedule. I dont mind if
> > he
> > > misses a day , but I would not want him to miss
> > > whole week. As soon as I know his practice
> > schedule
> > > I will tell you. Paula
> > > John Bescherer <firstname.lastname@example.org> wrote:
> > > Sorry but your message said that ***you***
> > > planning a camping trip. How was I supposed to
> > know
> > > that you wanted to include the boys?
> > >
> > > You already tied up Owen for all of August, so I
> > > need
> > > him this weekend. Get him to skip football and I
> > > would
> > > change my mind. Last weekend I already talked
> > > the
> > > boys about what we would do this weekend. They
> > > no
> > > idea you were planning a trip for my weekend.
> > >
> > > --- Paula Nicholson
> > > wrote:
> > >
> > > > John- I spoke to you several times about the
> > fact
> > > > that this upcoming week was the pone that I
> > > > taking time off to bring the boys camping. I
> > even
> > > > included it in an email I sent you over a
> > > ago.
> > > > I will work out whatever time you want to go
> > > > camping, but it is unfair to try to do it this
> > > week,
> > > > when I have plans that have been in the works
> > for
> > > > almost two months. Paula
> > > > Paula Nicholson
> > > wrote: Date:
> > > > Tue, 13 Jun 2006 16:49:12 -0700 (PDT)
> > > > From: Paula Nicholson
> > >
> > > > Subject: summer camp for Owen
> > > > To: John Bescherer
> > > >
> > > > John---
> > > > Id like to send Owen to a summer camp program.
> > > > His closest friend here (MAX) is going to a
> > > at
> > > > the Sandwich Heritage Museum and Gardens. He
> > went
> > > > last year and said it was fabulous. Will you
> > chip
> > > > in on the cost with me??? It is 300.00 for 1
> > week.
> > >
> > > > The week that Max is going is is July 17-21. I
> > am
> > > > also planning a camping trip to Maine July
> > > 23-27th.
> > > > Do you have any plans that I should know
> > If
> > > > you are looking for an extened period with the
> > > boys
> > > > the 7th-17th is free. August is still pretty
> > > > unplanned also, except that Owen will be doing
> > > > football 4 days a week starting the week of
> > > > August6th. Just thought you should know....Let
> > me
> > > > know if Camp is a possibility for Owen.
> > > > Thanks---Paula
> > > > http://www.heritagemuseumsandgardens.org/ > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > > > > Do You Yahoo!? > > > > Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam > > > > protection around > > > > http://mail.yahoo.com
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > ---------------------------------
> > > > Want to be your own boss? Learn how on Yahoo!
> > > Small
> > > > Business.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
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